Stupid thieves

My parents' house was broken into yesterday by perhaps the stupidest thieves ever. They threw a rock through the glass doors to the dining hall and went through most of my parents' house. They took a couple of watches and a camera. The camera was a loss, although I suspect the most expensive item was the glass door itself. They are, understandably, upset by the break-in. The humor is not lost on them, however. The facts:

1) My parents' two large dogs (boxers) were in the family room, held from the robbers by only a small child gate resting over the door. THEY NEVER LEFT THE ROOM. Damn dogs. What are you good for?

2) Luckily enough, my parents' computers and widescreen tv are in the family room with the dogs, and despite the dogs' apparent aversion to conflict, the thieves were too scared to go in there.

3) The robbers rummaged through my mother's filing cabinet, yet managed to miss the four thousand dollars in cash there (I've been trying to get her to deposit the savings she periodically collects for years).

4) They also missed at least two full pill bottles of oxycotin (my mom is disabled and takes painkillers regularly). Do you know how much that shit is worth on the street?

Luckily, my parents keep their more expensive jewelry in a safety deposit box at the bank. Still, *why* would you even risk arrest when all you end up getting is a couple of used watches and a run-of-the-mill digital camera? Idiots.